RIN - brainfood. Lyrics

Why cant I seem to work this thing out
I'm Falling apart as I drown
Said I'm getting better its lies
Tossing and turning in the night
Wanted to get better but
I don't fit that sweater
Wanting to end my life
So I write this letter
To tell you why
But it isn't black and white
Loaded gun to my head
Tried to do It right
But I can't keep on going
Can't see the bigger picture
So I pray for life
As I pull this trigger
Regret fills my mind
As Memories flash
For the last time
Woke up in the black
Now I can't seem to get out
Said I'd leave it all
To get away from the pain
But now all I want to do is get back home
But I can't
What's done is done