Julia Gartha - California's Killing Me Lyrics

I think I got backwards seasonal depression
Looking outside at the sun with the wrong impression
Californias killing me
Thought I'd never ever wanna leave
Maybe there's no such thing as the right direction

Sitting in the sad is something I've been bad at
I wait for it to pass till it comes back around again
Oh you can see it in my hands
Reflected in my skin

And I know this won't last forever
But God I wish I was better
When there's too much on my mind
Oh I try to blame it on the weather
My heart wants to crack under pressure
So why can't I just let it
When I try to fall apart
I can't help keeping it together

I get stuck in my bed
Can't keep my house clean
Sweeping things under the rug's my idea of healing
I put make up on my misery
Cover it up so nobody sees
To be terrified you're alive is a dangerous feeling

Oh sitting in the sad is something I've been bad at
I wait for it to pass till it comes back around again
Oh you can see it in my hands
Reflected in my skin

And I know this won't last forever
But God I wish I was better
When there's too much on my mind
Oh I try to blame it on the weather
My heart wants to crack under pressure
So why can't I just let it
When I try to fall apart
I can't help keeping it together