Johniepee - Smile Shotgun Lyrics

Why's everybody walking round with a sad face?
Turn that frown upside down man, this life's great
Everybody must've of gotta order of lemon with brekky cos their faces screwed up like a sour taste
Alright, what's going on, fill me in mate
Tell me what's gone wrong, to leave you this way
Well I got a coffee this morning and it was luke warm, he put too much milk in my latté
What, really, okay, that's your problem man?
I thought it might've been serious
Well I am pissed off, but that's not all it was
I went to buy the new cod. And they told me they were outta stock
Ah yep, cry me a river bro, problems, hmm man you've got none of those
Buuuuuut my internets running kinda slow
So I couldn't download the latest ep of game of thrones. Shutup bro!

Man I wish I had a smile shotgun
Dunno if they exist, but if they did I want one, cos I'm sick of this shit
Forgot how to do that thing with their cheeks and their lips
I bet a shotty to their noggin gettem smiling a bit
I want a smile shotgun
Think I could probably make one
I can't stress enough, that it's not a real gun
But it's real fun knocking on their door, let the shotty pump see if I can cheer em up
That's what's up

Oi dude, You got nothing to complain about
The only time your life is dark is when the lights go out
Only time your life is hard is when you're grunting on the toilet making noises
Cos you've left your Fibre out
Of your diet
I can't wait to try it
Running around the country they'll call me the smile pirate
Long John Smiley, got em smiling at a funeral or pointing guns in cubicles, grinning at the urinals
And if I walked past a group of girls with their hair in curls
Saying FML while grinding paint off their cuticles
I might be due to hurl
But I'll hold it in, make em grin
Making things right
Like my name is Earl
And if a mate was looking down, I'd ask him what's the deal
He'd tell me that his phone died and the pain was real
I'd tell him brother don't cry and the pain will heal
Put the shotty to his head and make him buy a happy meal

Man I wish I had a smile shotgun
Dunno if they exist, but if they did I want one, cos I'm sick of this shit
Forgot how to do that thing with their cheeks and their lips
I bet a shotty to their noggin gettem smiling a bit
I want a smile shotgun
Think I could probably make one
Can't stress enough, that it's not a real gun
But it's real fun knocking on their door, let the shotty pump see if I can cheer em up
That's what's up

We've got you surrounded
If you are frowning
Why's everybody walking round like debbie downers.
How 'bout you try this
Touch your cheeks to your eyelids
And whether or not, you wanted to do it
Guess what? I got you smiling

I'm gonna call a manufacturer, get it happening
So I can kickstart putting smiles on the map again
The fella on the phone passed me to his manager
Who said I was a dick and to never call back again
So I got my Google on, click up
I researched a few words, then a hiccup
Apparently forcing anyone to do anything with a gun isn't really fun, it's called a stick up
Oops, I guess I didn't really realise
I just wanted everyone to smile and have and have good time
When did cheering people up become a big crime
Now police track my movements
When I'm online
I'm not allowed to leave my house, I've gotta stay inside
This ankle thing seems to shock me everytime I try
But that's alright, cos I keep watching people through the blinds
I even made a sign
That says, I'll smile til the day I die

Man I wish I had a smile shotgun
Dunno if they exist, but if they did I want one, cos I'm sick of this shit
Forgot how to do that thing with their cheeks and their lips
I bet a shotty to their noggin gettem smiling a bit
I want a smile shotgun
Think I could probably make one
Can't stress enough, that it's not a real gun
But it's real fun knocking on their door, let the shotty pump see if I can cheer em up
That's what's up