CowardlyCrow - self-sabotage Lyrics

Curl up on my bed, I need to clear my head
Figure out what's happening to me
And once the day is gone, I'll run far so I don't get caught
I'm a weakling on the run
I trip over rocks and scrape my knees
And once I'm set and done, I'll let myself bleed
What's the harm in doing nothing?
What's the harm if I do nothing?
Self-sabotage, it's just what I do
And it won't be long before it infects you too
Self-sabotage, it's a risky game
But it's a game I'm always playing
I wake up in tears and covered in sweat
It's already been a year and I'm still not over it
I get down on my knees and say"Lord, let me forget"
I'm not up to Her to take up that bet
I try to be good, I try to be clean
But everything I do makes me feel more seen
I would be lying if I said I wasn't scared
And gosh, I hate your demeaning stares
You probably think I'm unaware
I won't say a prayer this time, I swear
Low self-esteem, failing beliefs
It's all my fault, everything's wrong
Failure to failure
Feelings and thoughts
I lost myself, but you never knew me at all