Maybe emojis are just us regressing back to hieroglyphics
The entire human race is all a bunch of homos if we're speaking scientifically
And being attracted to your own flaccid penis would be the worst fetish ever
And whenever a pregnant woman swims, she's a human submarine
Know what I mean?
If you call someone a two-dollar whore, it's meaner than before because of inflation
And if gluttony's a sin, then why is the Bible belt the fattest part of the American nation?
And if you'd never seen a chicken, but you ordered chicken fingers
You'd think that chickens were big and scary
And if Mary had Jesus, and Jesus is the lamb of God, then Mary had a little lamb
You understand?
Hands are naked sock puppets, coffee is bean soup, bunk beds are people shelves
And someone should open an abortion clinic and call it Don't Kid Yourselves
And someone should start a liquor company and call it Responsibly
And a group of squid should be called a squad
And bisexual women should be called more-or-less-bians
Does that make sense?
It's pretty weird that we can unintentionally make a person but not dessert
And it's pretty weird that people will eat each others' assholes but not eat food that fell in the dirt
And it's pretty weird that people have birthday sex
Which is basically having sex to celebrate your parents having sex
I guess people are just plain weird
I mean we invented selfie sticks and snuggies and fidget spinners
Kazoo (Live from Acme Comedy Company, Minneapolis, MN) Video (MV)
Caitlin Cook - Kazoo (Live from Acme Comedy Company, Minneapolis, MN) Lyrics
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Maybe emojis are just us regressing back to hieroglyphics
The entire human race is all a bunch of homos if we're speaking scientifically
And being attracted to your own flaccid penis would be the worst fetish ever
And whenever a pregnant woman swims, she's a human submarine
Know what I mean?
If you call someone a two-dollar whore, it's meaner than before because of inflation
And if gluttony's a sin, then why is the Bible belt the fattest part of the American nation?
And if you'd never seen a chicken, but you ordered chicken fingers
You'd think that chickens were big and scary
And if Mary had Jesus, and Jesus is the lamb of God, then Mary had a little lamb
You understand?
Hands are naked sock puppets, coffee is bean soup, bunk beds are people shelves
And someone should open an abortion clinic and call it Don't Kid Yourselves
And someone should start a liquor company and call it Responsibly
And a group of squid should be called a squad
And bisexual women should be called more-or-less-bians
Does that make sense?
It's pretty weird that we can unintentionally make a person but not dessert
And it's pretty weird that people will eat each others' assholes but not eat food that fell in the dirt
And it's pretty weird that people have birthday sex
Which is basically having sex to celebrate your parents having sex
I guess people are just plain weird
I mean we invented selfie sticks and snuggies and fidget spinners
The entire human race is all a bunch of homos if we're speaking scientifically
And being attracted to your own flaccid penis would be the worst fetish ever
And whenever a pregnant woman swims, she's a human submarine
Know what I mean?
If you call someone a two-dollar whore, it's meaner than before because of inflation
And if gluttony's a sin, then why is the Bible belt the fattest part of the American nation?
And if you'd never seen a chicken, but you ordered chicken fingers
You'd think that chickens were big and scary
And if Mary had Jesus, and Jesus is the lamb of God, then Mary had a little lamb
You understand?
Hands are naked sock puppets, coffee is bean soup, bunk beds are people shelves
And someone should open an abortion clinic and call it Don't Kid Yourselves
And someone should start a liquor company and call it Responsibly
And a group of squid should be called a squad
And bisexual women should be called more-or-less-bians
Does that make sense?
It's pretty weird that we can unintentionally make a person but not dessert
And it's pretty weird that people will eat each others' assholes but not eat food that fell in the dirt
And it's pretty weird that people have birthday sex
Which is basically having sex to celebrate your parents having sex
I guess people are just plain weird
I mean we invented selfie sticks and snuggies and fidget spinners
Writer: Caitlin Cook
Copyright: Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid
Copyright: Lyrics © O/B/O DistroKid